Dear Die-ary

Quizzes

2005-11-30T08:55:00.000-05:00

Quizzes

You're 'Strawberry Gashes'! Deep, dark and poetic.
You're a very emotional and passionate person.
And probably suicidal, also.

Which Jack Off Jill song are YOU!?
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Gothic Boys

You have a dark personality and style, which
reaches out to those boys with numerous tattoos
and piercings, and black hair. they like you
and you like them, so the next time your eying
that.. cute.. goth boy, you should go for it!

What kind of boys like you? (GiRLZ ONLii<3>
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how do people see you? they don't, i mean they can,
but they hardly notice you. no one ever
listens, but they should.

how do people look at you? (anime pics!)
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The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

You are Agnostic

You're not sure if God exists, and you don't care.

For you, there's no true way to figure out the divine.

You rather focus on what you can control - your own life.

And you tend to resent when others "sell" religion to you.

What's Your Religious Philosophy?

You Are a Goth!

You're so gothically outrageous, and you aren't afraid to flaunt it.

Whether you dress up like Robert Smith or a tragic Little Bo Peep,

chances are that you'll be parading around with the rest of the goths at Yoyogi Park on Sunday.

Don't forget your white makeup and blue lipstick! Who knows?

You may just get picked up by one of the seedy photographers.

What's Your Japanese Subculture?

The Cure Shares Your Taste in Music

See their whole playlist here (iTunes required)

Which Musician (or Group) Shares Your Taste in Music?

Arty Kid

Whether you were a drama freak or an emo poet, you definitely were expressive and unique.

You're probably a little less weird these days - but even more talented!

Who Were You In High School?

I LOVE STEPHEN ANTHONY ALVARADO!(LOL! He's probably gunna kill me for saying his whole name!)

2005-11-14T09:15:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I was feeling all upset for different reasons. Mostly because of my body image problems. I really don't like the way I look all that much. I think I'm too fat and that I'm ugly. Some of the things he said just made me start crying and thinking "I'm so lucky." It's hard to find a guy who really likes you the way you are. One that you don't have to worry about putting on makeup because no matter what you're always beautiful to him.

I'm suprised that he hasn't left me for someone else. I know he has to get tired of me crying and having to help me. Me being so far away doesn't help either but the distance doesn't seem to matter. It really never did. Even when I did start to stray from him, I could never stop thinking about him. I still loved him very much. I was just mad at him because of the way he had been treating me then.

I just can't wait until I move there with him. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life by his side.

2005-10-26T08:54:00.000-04:00

I just wish someone would just even act concerned about me. I just feel like all anyone wants to do is just dig me deeper into the grave I started digging myself.One day,it seems like they care, the next day it's like I mean nothing.

I swear this world is out to end me.I'm on the verge to start cutting again. I've already begun to scratch over my old scars. School is really not helping either. If I were not in school it would elimninate two reasons I'm not doing so well emotionally. I was doing better there for a while. I wasn't completely happy, true. But Stephen was helping me stop cutting and was trying to make me happy and he did. He may be a little overprotective, but it shows that he really cares about me. The only issue is that I don't think he trusts me. But he still seems like the only person who cares at all. I just wish he was here with me.I need someone here to just tell me everythings alright. Someone to just care. Unlike someone I know who says one thing of or show that they may like me and the next day it seems like they despise me. I'm sick of this! I just wish things would just be better. Either that or I just go to sleep and never wake up.

Anniversary

2005-09-17T13:09:00.000-04:00

My boyfriend and I have been together a year.I'm really too happy to type out one of these long journal entries that describe the relationship since it started.Plus,it's really none of your business :p

Insomnia and poor sleeping habits

2005-08-14T21:26:00.000-04:00

I haven't been getting much sleep lately.Truth is,I'm afraid to go to sleep.I've been having terrible nightmares.I find out Stephen is hurt and the people that did it are coming after me.He keeps telling me to run away and save myself,the people who are doing this will get thier's in the end if I just run.But I can't run away from him in the state he is in.It gets to the point where I'm fighting these guys off with all that I have and I can't fight anymore.That's when I wake up in a cold sweat.It's terrible.

And I think it's affected my eating habits.I didn't eat ANYTHING for two days.And I haven't been eating much lately anyway.I've lost 6 pounds over the last 2 weeks.My grandfather is starting to get really concerned.When I told my dad he got upset about it.And to tell you the truth...I'm scared too.I'm afraid to tell Stephen about any of this.It's just something I have to face on my own

NtHM

2005-07-23T07:58:00.000-04:00

I know all exes are an annoyance(unless you've agreed to be friends),but mine's EXREAMLY annoying. To the point were I want to rip off every one of his limbs(very slowly and painfully), put them in a garbage bag, and throw them in a river. And they'd never catch me either because I'm smart enough to use gloves and then burn them after I'm done. But anyway, onto the reason I was for his demise...

He's wanting to get back with me. He's been trying to get a little too close to me. Complementing me is ok. I don't mind him doing that. But when he started saying "I still love you" it's gone too far. And when he bad mouths my boyfriend, I turn into a monster and am now planning on how the hell to kill him. He doesn't even know Stephen. All he knows is that it's a long distance relationship and that's what the excuse he's giving me to break up. He's all like "Stephen's gunna cheat on you!It's the truth!"And that was the first stupid thing he said beacuse:

A.Stephen's ex cheated on him TWICE and SLEPT with other guys. It was the reason they broke up. He was so depressed when it happened. I know that he doesn't want me to to feel as bad as he did

B.That's not a truth, that's a hope. He hopes it'll happen and he thinks that if it does I'll run to him for comfort. I'll never go within ten feet of him, unless I'm killing him. And how can it be a truth if it hasn't happened yet?Like I said,my ex is an idiot. He acts like a stubborn child

And before I blocked him he typed "He doesn't love you" over and over again. Again showing how much of an immature brat he is. If Stephen didn't love me he would've stayed with me for 10 months

Vanity is a bliss...

2005-07-17T16:23:00.000-04:00

I've been having body image issues ever since I was just a tiny little kid. Before I should even have to care about the way I looked. When I was little all the other kids didn't want to play with me because I was "too fat". I was called fatty, fatso, and any other name you can think of. I tried to lose weight but no matter what I did I was always "too fat"

That's me when I was little and I now I think "How the hell is that fat!?" I think I look like a healthy little girl.That's why I hate most people today.It's always outer beauty that people seem to always judge by. And everyone is wondering why so many kids cut, purge, stop eating or commit suicide these days

Cheese...

2005-06-22T21:45:00.000-04:00

Don't eat the cheese...It will betray you.I once loved to cheesy goodness of cheese.But it turned on me and gave me a stomach ache.How could you do this to me cheese?!Why?!

HAHA!

2005-06-09T15:14:00.000-04:00

This is just too funny not to post

Jim & Edna

Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the hospital director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered that Edna be discharged from the hospital because she now considered Edna to be mentally stable.
The director went to Edna and said, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you being discharged because you responded so rationally to a crisis by jumping into the pool to save the life of another person. Your action displays sound mindedness. The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead."
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"

Summers here!

2005-05-20T12:02:00.000-04:00

YAY!School's out!I won't have to go back unless I have to go to summer school.But that'll only last 3 weeks(I'll still get two months).So...yea...YAY!

I'm tired of people's shit!

2005-05-16T20:19:00.000-04:00

Today I found out that I ruined squee's(that's just a nickname I gave him that he hates) life.I'm like "What the hell did I do?".He won't even explain to me what I did to him that was sooo horrible.I mean,I honestly don't know what the hell I did.All I know is I'm pissed as hell.Now I look back at my friendship with him and see all the secrets I trusted him with.All the times I stood up for him when people talked about him while he wasn't around.I don't feel bad...no...I'M NEVER GOING TO FEEL BAD FOR THAT LITTLE SON OF A BITCH EVER AGAIN!Yea,it kinda hurts.But it's because I hurt a person.Not because I hurt him.I don't even know what I did.

Learn crap about me

2005-05-08T13:49:00.000-04:00

1.Name: Neb Tanner

2.Nick Name: Nebbie

3. Middle Name: L :p

4.Hair Color: Dark Brown

5.Eye Color: Blue/Gray/Green(they change color)

6. Height: About 5'5

7.Location: The hick infested state of North Carolina

8.Birthday: April 27,1990

9.Zodiac: Taurus in the year of the Horse

1o.Status: Taken

11.Animal/s: Ravens

12. Sport/s: No

13.Color/s: Black,gray,and purple

14. Song/s: too many to name

15.Band/Singer/s: see above answer

18.Scent/Perfume(s): Coffee!!!!

19.Movie/s: Underworld,The Crow,NBC

2o.Holiday Season: Halloween

21.Season/s: Winter

22.Element: Darkness

23.Book/s: Can't think of one

24.Do you wear makeup?: yes

25.Do you trim your eyebrows?: when they need it

26.Do you look for personality or looks in a

guy?: Personality

27.Perfect guy:

28. How many rings before you answer the

phone? : however long it takes for the caller ID to show up

29.Future Career plans: Writer,Artist,Computer graphics designer

30. Do you sleep with stuffies?: I hug pillows

31. Do you want kids?: Yes
32. Are you popular?: No,people think I'm "wierd"

33. Are you handsome?: umm...no

34. Do you have your own phone line?: No

35. Do you get along with your family?: Well,I get along well with my mom.But my dad's an ass

36.Do you have any piercing?: only my ears

37. Do you like giving hugs?: Not really.Depends on who it is

38.Do you take walks in the rain?: I like rainy days

39. Which Malls do you frequent?: Eastridge

40. Do you go on stage? yes

41.Favourite Drink: Sweet Tea and COFFEE!

42.Do You Smoke?: No

43.Do you do drugs?: No(suprisingly.lol!)

44.Do you Eat meat?:Umm...yes....I did not climb to the top of the food chain to eat a frikin' carrot

45.What's your favorite Date: October 31st
46. Have you had Sex before?: No

47. Do you eat sushi?: I've had it once or twice

48. Do you Bake?: yes

49. Hot or Cold?: Cold

50.Lace or Satin?: Satin

51.Blue or Red?: Red

52.New or Old?: Depends

53.Rain or Snow?: Rain

55.Wool or Cotton?: Cotton

56.Roses or Daisies?: Roses

57.Private school or public school?: Public

58.Plain milk or chocolate milk?: Chocolate

59.Celsius or Fahrenheit?: Fahrenheit

60.Spring or Fall?: Fall

61.Math or Art?: ART!(sevas tra)

62.One pillow or two?: One

63. Dogs or Cats?: Cats

64.Adidas or Nike?: I prefer boots

65.Coke or Pepsi?: Pepsi

66.Oranges or Apples?: Oranges

67.Deaf or Blind?: Blind,because I could still listen to mucic and live in my own little world

68.Pool or hot tub?: pool

69.Blonde or Brunette?: Brunnette

7o.Guys or Girls?: Guys

71.Tall or short?: what?

72.TV or Radio?: Radio

Personal Views.

73.Homosexuality?: I couldn't care less on the sexual orientation of a person is.As long as they're nice to me I'm ok.And if it's a lesbian she doesn't hit on me

74.Brand names: What's the point?

75.Abortion: No Comment.I'm both pro life and pro-choice at some point

76.Religion: Agnostic

77.Animal Rights: umm...

78.Love at first sight: Can happen

79.God: I don't paricuarly believe in him.But here is somthing out there

80.Aliens: of course they exist

81.Horoscopes: some are true

82.Heaven: No

83.Hell: No

84.Reincarnation: True

85.Transvestites: These questions are getting stupid

86.Boy Bands: umm...I don't like um

87.Genres: ...

88.80's music: I dunno

89.Punk Rock: Don't listen to it much anymore

90.Whats the sexiest instrument/s?: Bass

91.Whats the prettiest part of the body?: Eyes

92.Biggest fault: I'm too frikin' Nice

93.Biggest fear: Having to watch the people that I love die and I can't do anything to save them

94.Do you live in the moment?: Sometimes.

95.Do you care about looks? No (only mine.I look terrible)

96.Do you like your handwriting? Sometimes it's cool,other times it's terrible
97.Biggest Worries: I try not to worry

98.Looking forward to: My wedding day ^^

99.Favorite weather: Thunderstorms (even though thunder sometimes scares me)

100.Do you ever wish you were somebody else?: Yea